7 Jan
2013
7 Jan
'13
4:07 p.m.
Ugh - that's not good for our community. Y'know, I've been dancing for years,
but often people tell me, hey, don't pull so hard, and I am always happy to adjust
because I do not want to be the cause of someone else's pain or discomfort. I'm
sure that there are probably several dancers who just don't dance with me because I
might have tugged too hard or cranked too hard in the past - all they have to do is say
so. People should be free to express to another dancer, hey, this hurts, don't do
that, and a good dancer should adjust.
Perry
________________________________
From: barb kirchner <barbkirchner(a)hotmail.com>
To: perry shafran <pshaf(a)yahoo.com>om>; callers(a)sharedweight.net
Sent: Monday, January 7, 2013 10:26 AM
Subject: RE: [Callers] women's experiences
when i am able to dance these days, i almost always dance the gent's role. i have a
problem with my right foot and too many guys just don't pick up on signals and it
gets tiring for me to tell people to stop yanking me around.
but even when i was a dancing fanatic, there were experienced men i never danced with
because they were absolutely sure they could throw me around no matter how many times i
asked them not to.
yup, at some dances, it's just how things are. on the other hand, i've been to
plenty of dances where i've been treated courteously and appropriately, so i tend to
think it is the culture of the particular dance community or region.
cheers,
barb
Date: Mon, 7 Jan 2013 06:04:16 -0800
From: pshaf(a)yahoo.com
To: callers(a)sharedweight.net
Subject: Re: [Callers] women's experiences
I am curious - is this seen more often in women than it is in men playing the role of the
woman? I've been the woman a number of times in dances, and I do see the pushiness of
some males - twirling me when I don't want to be twirled, even being subject to a
(small) dip one time. Generally though (at least in my home communities) I'm not
subject to this. It also doesn't SEEM like women are resigned to pushy males - most
ladies I see seem to enjoy their twirls and dips - but that could be due to the
segregation of lines that has occurred, at least at Glen Echo.
Perry
________________________________
From: Ron T Blechner <contraron(a)gmail.com>
To: Caller's discussion list <callers(a)sharedweight.net>
Sent: Monday, January 7, 2013 8:45 AM
Subject: Re: [Callers] women's experiences
I've been having conversations with a lot of my female friends in the dance
community over the past 6 months over their experiences as women. I won't
make a lengthy itemization of what I've found, because I think it's
something every caller should do for themself, however, the one thought I'd
share is the one I find most disappointing:
- Women have expressed that they put up with far more crap from pushy males
than I personally would put up with had the situation be reversed; there is
a far more prevalent sense of resignation of "that's just how things are /
it's not so bad" than I had believed.
in dance,
Ron
On Mon, Jan 7, 2013 at 1:27 AM, Aahz Maruch <aahz(a)pobox.com> wrote:
On Sun, Jan 06, 2013, Tom Hinds wrote:
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I haven't been following this topic of lead/follow at all but Bree's
statement really caught my eye. I'm very curious to know what it's
like to dance as a women with men who have a wide range of skills
and personalities.
I should set aside an evening and dance disguised as a women to
really understand what the experience is like.
Unless you have experience cross-dressing (i.e. can successfully
disguise yourself), your experience will almost certainly be somewhat
different from a woman's. I definitely get treated somewhat differently
by men.