Re: [Callers] Leading, consent in embellishments

Hello Jeanette! So excited about this topic. I help run a genderfree dance in Boston, and love what happens to a community with genderfree terminology*. Firstly, I agree with everything Maia has already said, particularly their point about finding it confusing if there isn't a clearly delegated "leader" at a given moment. Even though contra doesn't need to be a lead/followed dance in the conventional sense, it remains true that several of the most common moves are asymmetric (like swings or chains), so some leading and following is simply par for the course. Further, it's unavoidable that many dancers will spice up their dancing with strictly lead and followed flourishes. My favorite way of indicating role is via palm direction; if you're in the traditionally "gent" role, your palms face up; "ladies" palms face down. This is preferable to me over visual signifiers like arm bands or neck ties, because you can more easily switch roles with your partner mid-dance. As a woman-type person who enjoys being in charge (it's like I'm a caller or something), the opportunity to lead (or follow!) in contra dance is important to me. I totally agree with Maia's thoughts on teaching consent, and the mechanisms by which a "lead" or "followed" move occur. I would further encourage you to teach *all *dancers to better hold their own weight; I've found that most women who have traditionally danced in the Lady's role take for granted the upper body strength of a traditional male gent, such that if I'm leading, I find myself hurting from supporting their weight during swings. It's worthwhile to call back to what John has already said about physics, but with the important caveat that body size/weight/height are the more important factor, not gender. In short, I would encourage you to teach not only symmetric swing holds like you mentioned, but also teach techniques by which lead/followed dancing may be more comfortable and safe for everyone involved, regardless of whether their gender identity correlates to their chosen dance role. These methods include the accept/decline system Maia discussed, the issue of shared weight, the use of palm direction to indicate role intention, and the use of genderfree or inclusive language**. Good luck! Angela *Our community was already relatively young, queer, and prone to role switching. After officially switching to genderfree terminology, however (we use Larks and Ravens), the number of long-time and novice dancers alike trying new things or dancing in unfamiliar roles had increased drastically! Not only do I firmly believe that this means our dancers are more skilled (they're more equipped to understand and deal with confusion in the line, on the whole), but I also believe that our community is stronger, since partnering isn't limited. **By "inclusive language," I mean saying things outright like, "We use the terms Gents and Ladies to differentiate between dance roles, but those traditional trends ate totally non-binding! Please feel free to dance in either role at any time, and see which one you like better. Some days I like dancing in both roles; other times I want to dance just in one role or the other!" (Side bar: when I'm teaching a beginners' lesson, I make a point to model this behavior; sometimes I'll deliberately ask a novice of the same gender presentation as me to demo a swing; sometimes I'll deliberately call upon a gender-queer community member to model the "which role do you prefer?" conversation, and follow through by using their pronouns as I describe what we're doing to the beginners, i.e., "They are in the Raven's role, I am dancing as a Lark" etc). On Sun, Mar 11, 2018, 12:40 PM Maia McCormick via Callers < callers(a)lists.sharedweight.net&gt; wrote: