27 Aug
2013
27 Aug
'13
8:54 p.m.
Aahz wrote:
Certainly. And there are also lots of assumptions
behind any human
interaction. For example, I tend to be somewhat blind to a lot of
non-verbal cues (partly due to my hearing impairment, partly due to
personality), so I might well have done the same thing as "that guy"
simply because I didn't recognize the two of you as a couple.
Well, I can see what you're saying. But we were in conversation with full
eye contact, and he interrupted me in mid-sentence. It was like I wasn't
even there. I'm glad it happened because I am now very cautious when
approaching two people in conversation--particularly if they look like
newcomers. I don't interrupt people in mid-sentence. I often address the
gent first, and ask him if he is planning to ask this lady to dance. (I
probably should change this strategy and address them both, asking if they
are planning to dance together for the next dance.) If not I would then
ask the lady to dance. Often this question prompts the gent to immediately
ask the woman to dance.
"That guy," by the way, turned out to be a rather decent fellow, just a
little lacking in social skills. He was a life-long social dancer for whom
dancing was where he was able to stand out. He was tuned into the local
dance culture where partnering quickly for the next dance was the prime
directive. I am glad that that dance culture is changing.
Greg McKenzie
West Coast, USA
***********
On Tue, Aug 27, 2013 at 3:35 PM, Aahz Maruch <aahz(a)pobox.com> wrote:
On Tue, Aug 13, 2013, Greg McKenzie wrote:
Good ideas. As to the contra dance subculture: I was taken to my first
contra dance by a woman I had fallen in love with. We were there for
only
a few minutes when a regular dancer came over to
her and--without
acknowledging my presence or even making eye contact--asked my sweetheart
to dance. I was shocked. I thought it was the rudest thing I'd seen in
years. And I never forgot that guy.
I always try to remember that there are a lot of assumptions we make at
contra dances. Newcomers don't understand many of them.
Certainly. And there are also lots of assumptions behind any human
interaction. For example, I tend to be somewhat blind to a lot of
non-verbal cues (partly due to my hearing impairment, partly due to
personality), so I might well have done the same thing as "that guy"
simply because I didn't recognize the two of you as a couple.
--
Hugs and backrubs -- I break Rule 6
http://rule6.info/
<*> <*> <*>
Help a hearing-impaired person: http://rule6.info/hearing.html
_______________________________________________
Callers mailing list
Callers(a)sharedweight.net
http://www.sharedweight.net/mailman/listinfo/callers