[Callers] Difficult dancers - Decision to ask not to return

Dale Wilson via Callers callers at lists.sharedweight.net
Fri Mar 10 09:19:01 PST 2017


It's not about being the best dancers, or putting on the best show.  For
that, go watch "Dancing With the Stars" or better yet a performance by your
local ballet troupe   It's about a community getting together to enjoy each
others company.  Dancing happens along the way.  Tolerance should happen,
too.

   - So being a "poor" dancer (whatever the cause) is never a reason to ask
   someone to leave -- although it may prompt some very careful, very friendly
   advice, to try to help the person improve.


   - Being a "dangerous" dancer should trigger a stronger response.  Make
   the person aware that certain activities are unacceptable (for example at
   our dances lifting a partner off the ground is forbidden) and other
   activities frowned upon (for example forcing a partner to go beyond their
   abilities or desires.)

Even then the response should not be to ban the offender.  Just to educate
them firmly and stop the problem behavior.    Of course if the problem
doesn't stop further action may be necessary, but still it is unlikely to
require a ban.


   - Having unfortunate personal habits (two much perfume, too little
   bathing, or showing up chemically impaired) should also trigger a firm, but
   kindly-intended response.

The most serious case is a "predatory" dancer who takes advantage of
other's weaknesses.  A dancer who sees the occasion as a meat market or an
opportunity to "get a little."  A dancer who uses the occasion to
intimidate or harrass other dancers.  For those cases, a ban may be the
appropriate response.  Fortunately these cases seem to be rare.

Dale

-- 
There are only two hard things in computer science: cache invalidation,
naming things, and off-by-one errors.
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