While there are things to be said for having a code of conduct (and my
organization does have one),
having one in place is neither necessary nor sufficient for dealing with
this person.
Is it possible to have a comforting female organizer get in touch with
some of the "disappeared" women
and discuss what's happened with them? This may help assure them that
the organization cares
about their comfort and safety and that of the dancers who continue, and
will also help to establish
how far over the boundaries his behaviors have gone, which might also
help you to decide whether
the guy needs a talking to and careful watching with banning in reserve,
or just immediate banning.
(Or whether the women not coming back to contra is all an unfortunate
coincidence.)
-- Alan
On 4/21/2014 1:06 PM, Quintin Aspin wrote:
Down here in Baltimore we are having a problem with a
dancer who
seems to be harassing young ladies , He seems particularly fond of
monopolizing their dances if he can , then moves on to sending
e-mails and giving small gifts ... Shortly there after these
unfortunately targeted newcomers seem to stop coming to the dance ...
They do not complain to anyone in charge , they just disappear from
the dance community ..
It is a situation that I , as president of BFMS , only recently
became aware of , but in retrospect it seems to have been happening
to some extent since he moved down from the Boston area .
If this is a "new" behavior and he is amenable to change I will
either talk to him , or suggest the American dance chair has a few
words with him ... But if , as I now suspect , he was doing this same
behaviors in the Boston area perhaps firmer action might be needed .
There was , in fact , a discussion over on the callers list about a
dancer in the Boston area that seems eerily reminiscent of the
situation here ..
If any of the Boston area dance folks know of whom I speak , or if he
was banned from any dances up there it would be enormously helpful if
you could send me an e-mail with just the first name of the gent in
question ....
You can send it to my regular e-mail ( the one I am subscribed to
this list ) or to be at
President ( at )
bfms.org ...
A thousand thanks from me and from a lot of dancers who hopefully
will not have to find out first hand about which they should be
thankful ...
Rgds Quintin
Ps I have looked at all the contra dance "codes of conduct" I can
find and we are having a getting to get one set up here ....
Hopefully not shutting the gate after the horse ... etc..
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