Hello All,

I taught a dance this evening that included a ladies' gypsy. I received the email below a few minutes ago. In teaching it I wanted to convey that it is a flirty, eye contact sort of move. This person was obviously offended. I am at a loss for how to respond, except to apologize for offending. 

I'm pretty sure I described the move accurately. I meant absolutely no offense. I didn't make up the name for the move, but don't want to make excuses. Does this move need a new name? How would you respond?

-Amy

Seattle


Begin forwarded message:

Subject: First time at your event

This evening, I came to one of your dances for the first time. I was impressed by the friendliness of the dancers, the quality of the musicians, and the overall fun of the dance.

And then we got to a dance in which we were told we would be learning a step named after an offensive term for Romani people. And I felt uncomfortable. And then when the step was taught, it became clear that the term was so named based on stereotypes of Romani women as being overly sexual. And I became more uncomfortable.

I assume that this was not done maliciously, but rather out of an unawareness of the ways that that term has been used to denigrate Romani people throughout history (much the same way that many other racial slurs have been used in the past by well-meaning people before they became aware that those terms were hurtful and harmful to those disadvantaged groups).

Nonetheless, it felt shockingly offensive to me, all the more so in the context of a community that appeared to be so welcoming and accepting.

Until that point, I had a very enjoyable time dancing at your event. I've been a dancer in a variety of communities for many years now, and aside from that issue, this was probably the best first experience I've had when meeting a new dance community. It was a shame that some presumably unintentional racial insensitivity had to ruin what was otherwise such a positive experience.

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