Good questions Joseph.

My rate varies on several factors, some that you mentioned (close friends), but others include:

how far I have to drive increases the rate

which band would I work with, I charge less with folks I know will be easy to work with; and I only do live music for weddings

what are they expecting (duple improper contras versus community longways and circles); managing expectations of dedicated dancers who think their entire extended family will get to heys and contra corners, I'll charge extra for that.

is it an open bar, cash bar, or alcohol free (more alcohol -> higher fee)

The vast majority of weddings I've called haven't run on time; and so I don't charge an hourly rate. I bill a flat fee, on the understanding that I'll be there before they need me, stay late if that's where it's at, and probably only call three dances.

My regular rate ~$400 (I call weddings in VT, MA, and NY); which seems really high if I end up calling only 3 dances. But is also me giving up a Saturday evening. Imagine asking a plumber to be on site from 6 pm to 11 pm on a Saturday.

Close friends, less than that or free.

On Mon, Nov 10, 2025 at 2:32 PM Joseph Erhard-Hudson via Contra Callers <contracallers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote:

Hi all,

A good friend I made through contra dance has asked me to call some dancing at her wedding reception. (She is also a budding caller who I mentored for a while as she was getting started.) As soon as I said "yes", she asked what compensation would be meaningful to me, which strikes me as a thoughtful and thought-provoking way to put it.

While I ponder my answer, I'm curious to hear what other callers charge for wedding dances. If there's a range, would you ask differently for newly-met people vs. friends from your dance community vs. close friends and family? What other factors would you consider?

For myself, for very close friends I have sometimes refused payment out of love, considering it a wedding gift to them. Others view their own wedding as a time of outward generosity and wouldn't dream of paying less than the customary amount, whatever the heck that is. (I am also an occasional wedding officiant and faced the same conundrum there, but at least have a more well-defined range of fees from the local community to fall back on when either side considers full payment to be needed.)

I have called enough family events that I know what to bring and what to expect as a caller. I'd just like to focus on compensation here, unless there's something about the work that's needed from the caller that would influence what you ask.

Joseph Erhard-Hudson
Moscow, Idaho
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