I had what I assume is a similar response when I read that, John.

Aside to John: In this entire, ongoing discussion, it seems to me that there is an active conspiracy of pretense (along the lines of 'the emperor's new clothes') that the elephant sitting squarely in the middle of the room is actually a blueberry muffin.

Open and honest questions: 

Am I the only living person who has a preference for dancing with the opposite cisgender (realizing that any particular, such opposite, cisgendered individual may, in fact, have a different preference)?

If the above is a reasonable question, what is wrong with saying "If you have a preference to dance primarily with women, I recommend dancing the left role. If you have a preference to dance with men, I'd recommend dancing the right-side role; if you have no preference, it doesn't matter"?

What is the surveyed percentage of dancers in your community who have such a preference vs those who don't?