[Callers] Difficult dancers - Decision to ask not to return

Donna Hunt via Callers callers at lists.sharedweight.net
Fri Mar 10 12:29:16 PST 2017


 Please re-read my post.  I'm not talking about a missing a "hot groove" or the "hotshots" not having fun.  I didn't say to take their money and not allow them to dance.  Please don't minimize my suggestion.  We're brainstorming here and giving opinions.  Nothing stops productive discussion like an "I'm amazed some people would..." statement.

If a dancer fits my criteria, they can still be part of the dance community and visit with friends by being a greeter/door sitter/volunteer and dance with partners who are willing to support them.  Likewise if someone fits your description of twirling folks up and down the line without concern for their well being and that person should be counseled and educated by the dance committee.  Any regular member of a dance community is capable of recognizing those who enjoy being twirled.  If they don't recognize someone then consent should be obtained prior to twirling.

I've been dancing for 30 years.  When I'm not able to dance due to an injury, I take the door slots and greet people.  There are several folks in our dance community who have voluntarily done that over the past 10 years.  It allows folks to productively give back and be part of the evening, enjoy music and friends.  

Donna Hunt




 

 

-----Original Message-----
From: Jim Thaxter <jathaxter47 at gmail.com>
To: Donna Hunt <dhuntdancer at aol.com>; callers <callers at sharedweight.net>
Sent: Fri, Mar 10, 2017 11:16 am
Subject: Re: [Callers] Difficult dancers - Decision to ask not to return



Wow! I am amazed that some people would ask people not to dance after they've paid their admission fee, have come expecting to dance, and have been dancing for months, or perhaps years in some cases. Asking them to help out by sitting at the door or putting chairs away or other tasks done by volunteers (who have been dancing) seems patronizing to me. This doesn't seem like the inclusive atmosphere I've come to expect at dances I attend.


If putting other dancers at risk is the criteria for asking someone not to participate, would that include people who insist on twirling nearly everyone they meet down the line? People with shoulder problems, balance problems, other physical conditions that make it uncomfortable or even dangerous to be twirled are at risk.


Our Columbia, MO group has more than one person who has had a brain injury, stroke, hearing difficulty, MS, and we all happily dance with them and are glad to have them attend. We accommodate their "condition" and welcome them into the dance. Sure, you don't get that hot groove going when you dance with them. I like the groove when it happens, but that's not why I dance and I like it better when even those who aren't hotshots are having a great time.


Jim Thaxter


On Thu, Mar 9, 2017 at 1:48 PM Donna Hunt via Callers <callers at lists.sharedweight.net> wrote:




Would you ever (or have you ever) asked someone not to return based on their inability to dance?
Is there some point at which you as organizers would consider and ultimately such a decision?






 
Personally I think it's appropriate to ask someone not to dance if their inability puts other dancers at risk.  For example, someone with poor balance (or inability to move fast enough) who hangs on their partners or grasps them tightly (and painfully) for support.  If repeated intervention from the organizers cannot help, I would suggest that person be invited to be formal door sitter/greeter and perhaps dance with only a select few folks who understand and are willing to modify the dance for the individual and give them the support they need.


Donna Hunt



 

 

-----Original Message-----
From: Yoyo Zhou via Callers <callers at lists.sharedweight.net>
To: Mark Hillegonds <mark.hillegonds at gmail.com>
Cc: Caller's discussion list <callers at sharedweight.net>
Sent: Wed, Mar 8, 2017 4:28 pm
Subject: Re: [Callers] Difficult dancers - Decision to ask not to return





On Wed, Mar 8, 2017 at 10:26 AM, Mark Hillegonds via Callers <callers at lists.sharedweight.net> wrote:


So...what happens if all of the attempts to shepherd and coach and "angel" the difficult dancer do not work and their skills and abilities continue to be a significant negative impact when they're dancing. 


Would you ever (or have you ever) asked someone not to return based on their inability to dance?


I realize "inability" is a broad term and I intended it to be so for this question. There are lots of reasons why someone may not be able to know what to do and/or to be able to keep up when dancing and may not even be able to improve.


Is there some point at which you as organizers would consider and ultimately such a decision?




Here in the SF Bay Area, I know of one dancer who's no longer welcome back at their local dance because of mobility issues related to aging, and another who's no longer welcome back because of general behavioral issues related to Alzheimer's.


As far as I know, these dancers have simply been informed that their impairments preclude them from dancing with us. (This is different from being banned for bad behavior - they can still come but would be discouraged from dancing. By whom, I do not know.) I wasn't involved with the discussions that led to these decisions, so unfortunately I can't provide more background, but perhaps other people lurking on this list may be able to shed more light.


However, we have increased our attention on dancer safety in general, and it's worth thinking about whether someone's inability to dance actually affects how safe it is on the floor for them and others around them.


Yoyo Zhou




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