[Callers] Etiquette of refusing an offer to dance

[Read Weaver]

Why do you only put this in the women’s room? Perhaps you live somewhere where it’s unusual for a woman to ask a man to dance, but you say your sign goes on to say to find a dancer you want to dance with. And while I don’t question that men are more likely to do things to make a female partner uncomfortable, the reverse isn’t unheard of. And even if that never happened, putting it in both restrooms would let the men know what to expect.

Read Weaver
Jamaica Plain, MA
http://lcfd.org

> On Dec 17, 2017, at 12:30 PM, Amy Wimmer via Callers <callers at lists.sharedweight.net> wrote:
> 
> Greetings All,
> 
> I really like JD's methods. When teaching I do an abbreviated version of that, but I think I'll expand it to include a _kind_ refusal, and universal participation during the lesson. 
> 
> My husband and I are dance organizers, and for several years have been working hard to make the atmosphere of the dance welcoming and safe for all. We have signs in the restrooms about behavior. The one in the women's states that if one doesn't want to dance with someone, for any reason, it is best to be quick about it, saying, "No, thank you," so the ask-er has time to find a different partner. Skip the lengthy excuse, then find a partner you _want_ to dance with. 
> 
> Also, at the end of a dance, I often encourage people to invite someone who's sitting out to dance. Every once in a while I ask new folks to identify themselves, then ask experienced dancers to dance with them.
> 
> -Amy